The phone was ringing but I was kneeling by the bed. I was not in prayer. That was just the position I found myself in as my alarm had gone off five minutes previously when I knew I had to get out of bed somehow. I stumbled into the other room and answered. On the other end was my mum with the difficult news about her mother. I was not expecting that.
Suddenly, all things change – my plan for the day has gone, I need to call work, arrange for Anya to be cared for, work out when the shopping will be done – it wasn’t until 15 hours later that I realised I didn’t have a Nanna anymore.
It is so true that difficult times bring people together. By lunch many of us were together in Nanna’s old bungalow, still full of life. It was a good time together. Laughing about past memories, quoting Nanna and loving each other. I think we were all in a daze, not really knowing what to do. But that was ok. I love my family very much, all of them, and I wish I knew all of them better.
Rada was my rock, always there, never pushy but always there, ready to make eye contact or more when I needed it.
That night many church friends were together having a great time at a gig I had organised, more or less. We were back in time but I didn’t want to go. It wasn’t that I felt too sad or anything, I just needed to be at home. Nevertheless, I went to pick Anya up just as it was finishing. What I received there was overwhelming – the hugs, the simple touches, the thoughtful words.
As I drove home I knew very much that I was a loved person. But I also knew I didn’t have a Nanna anymore.